Ranma vs The Evil Dead I2005 RemakeI
by Chris Vegvary
Summary: A retelling of the classic battle between Ranma and The Evil Dead! Updated and remade for 2005.


FOREWORD: Ah, I sure do love all these remakes. Hollywood clearly does too, but they need to slow down just a bit. I know I go on about these things, but…let me talk about another type of movie: the sequel. I hear most people who say that they hate sequels and that they ruin the story, but I feel differently. I'm not so fond of _Alien,_ but _Aliens _is one of my all-time favorite movies. That really has nothing to do with the following story, so…I'm gonna stop now.

DISCLAIMER: Let's just say I don't own any of the characters portrayed in this story. If I did, I'd be selling this as a movie script instead of posting it free on this website. This fic contains extreme violence and adult language.

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Ranma vs. The Evil Dead (2005 Remake)  
by Chris Vegvary

"How much farther to the cabin, Ranma?" he heard Akane ask from behind him. He glanced back at her and the eight other people that followed them. The line went: Ranma, Akane, Ranko, Kuno, Ukyo, Ryoga, Mousse, Shampoo, Daisuke, and Hiroshi bringing up the rear. Each was outfitted in camping attire and was carrying all kinds of hiking gear.

They had followed a trail through the woods and were now coming to the end of that trail. The sun was close to setting, but not quite.

"About a mile," Ranma said, turning his gaze back towards the direction they were headed. "We just have to cross this bridge."

They stopped. Ahead of them lay a massive wooden bridge. The wood did not look all that sturdy to any of them, and with the exception of the twins, everyone was hesitant to cross over it.

"This bridge does not look safe," Kuno said, peering over the side and to the ground far, far below.

"Well, like I said before we left, Ranko and I haven't been here in ten years," Ranma said, facing the others, "but I'm sure it's completely safe."

He turned and took the first step onto the rickety bridge. The ropes that held the bridge up were hanging loosely to the wooden posts on either side of the gorge. He pressed onward and soon the others followed.

Once they were across, Ryoga spoke up. "Are you _sure_ this cabin's empty?"

Without turning, Ranma answered: "I just told you that I haven't been here in ten years. How should I know?"

"Don't worry, I don't think anyone else knew about the place," Ranko said. "I'm sure no one'll be there. I just hope there's electricity and running water…"

As they plodded on, Kuno began to talk to himself. "Ahh...to venture with the beauteous Akane Tendo and Ranko Saotome in the darkness of night…the opportunity shall not go to waste." Louder, he said: "Fear not, ladies! In the event of no light, I shall protect thee from harm's path."

"The only thing you need to protect us from is _yourself_, Kuno," Akane said, drawing laughs from the others.

Meanwhile, at the back of the line, Hiroshi and Daisuke were walking side by side. Hiroshi leaned over and whispered something to Daisuke, who was staring at something up ahead.

"Huh?" Daisuke responded distractedly. "Oh, sorry, I wasn't paying attention. I was watching Shampoo's ass."

"That's what I was pointing out to you."

Hiroshi watched as well. Soon, both boys were transfixed on Shampoo's ass as they walked. Out of the corner of his eye, Mousse saw the two and turned to Shampoo, who had her nose upturned.

"Isn't that bothering you?" he asked her.

"Not really," she said. "It not like they're going to get any from Shampoo."

After about ten more minutes, they finally arrived at the front of the cabin, where they stopped.

"This is it," Ranma said.

They looked it over. The cabin looked small and unkempt…but it also had a very ominous look to it. It was as if it were a living thing, waiting for you to go inside where it could digest you. The large, black, leafless trees surrounding the cabin for miles around didn't help the effect, either.

"Uh oh," Ranko said, pointing off to the right of the cabin. The others looked over and saw a gray Ford Tempo sitting parked. "Someone _has_ been here."

Ranma walked up to the car and studied it. It was covered by a thin layer of dirt, and he could just barely see through the passenger side window. He could see the keys hanging from the ignition.

"Whoever it is must still be here," Ranma said, turning back to the others. "The keys are still in the ignition."

Several groans emanated from the group, followed by loud sighs. Ranma headed for the front door of the cabin, followed closely by the others. He opened the door and stuck his head in. "Hello?"

There was no answer. He called out again, louder this time. Still there was no answer. Pushing the door open more, Ranma stepped inside and looked around. Besides all the furniture and decorations he remembered from his last visit, there were no signs of anyone else having been there recently. To be sure, he went to the hallway and checked each of the bedrooms. No suitcases, no signs of life. Ranma headed back to the front door and looked at the group. "Whoever it is, there's no sign of 'em. The place is ours."

"Let's go inside, then," Ukyo said after a moment. "I need a damn shower."

A few grunts of agreement, and they headed inside. They simultaneously dropped their packs and gear to the floor with sighs of relief. Ranko flipped the light switch on the wall up and the house became illuminated. "Al_right_, looks like we got electricity."

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After the group had settled, Ranma got some firewood and Ryoga built a fire. They sat clustered around it, playing cards and passing around a few bottles of sake. The mood was one of fun and light-heartedness.

An hour or so later, a few of the group decided to break off from the cluster. Kuno was one of the few, and he wandered out to the front porch, where he stood looking into the woods. He simply wanted to take a few breaths of fresh air…the air inside that cabin didn't smell right.

Once he was ready to go back inside, however, Kuno squinted at the trees. They swayed weirdly back and forth and the branches curled up like fingers, almost as if they were beckoning him. He was entranced by it. He could even vaguely hear them whispering his name: "_Kuno…Kuno…_"

And that was when he felt a hand on his shoulder. Startled, he whirled around to see Ranko standing over him. Apparently, in his trance, he had wandered down the porch steps and was now standing on the ground. Ranko stood on the third and topmost step, looking down at him with a slight grin.

"What are you doing out here, Kuno?"

"I, uh…was just getting some fresh air."

"Well, it looked like you were about to wander off. These woods are dangerous at night."

Kuno nodded, looking back towards the trees, which now swayed normally in the night breeze. Had he been mistaken? He turned back towards Ranko.

"Anyway, my pig-tailed goddess…what are _you_ doing out here?"

"Me? Same thing you are, I guess."

Kuno felt weird. She never acted like this around him, civil. Akane and Ranma were already dating, so Kuno's chances with her were slim to nil. But with Ranko, who knew? She was still widely available, but she had resisted all of Kuno's attempts thus far to "woo" her. He felt he had to ask her a question.

"I was wondering, Ranko…does it bother you that I constantly try to make you my woman? If so, I will desist. I do not wish to anger you."

Ranko seemed to mull it over for a moment. Kuno's heart was beating fast, as he was afraid of what her answer might be. "To tell you the truth, Kuno, it actually _flatters_ me that you want me. I mean, I was always second choice in life until I met you. You've picked me over anyone else on all occasions that required it. I mean, yeah, you can get pretty annoying sometimes, but…"

"Is it my difficulty in speaking like a...'regular' person?"

"Well, no." She smiled at him. "I like it when you spout irrelevant poetry."

Kuno sighed. "Then why do you continuously squash my emotions, along with my face?"

"I don't know. I guess I've just been trying to stay out of a relationship. But...maybe…if we tried, we could make it work."

"So you do not wish me to cease my actions?"

She shook her head and giggled slightly. _How uncharacteristic of her!_ Kuno thought. Another part of his mind whispered to him that he tried not to hear: _It's this place, don't be fooled. She doesn't _really _like you, this place is influencing her actions._

"You know what _I_ think?" she asked.

"What's that?"

With that, Ranko wrapped both her arms around his shoulders and pressed her lips against his. Kuno was taken aback by this and fell to the ground with Ranko on top of him. She began to kiss him fiercely, and he did the same.

The front door swung open suddenly and Ukyo stepped out. "Hey, guys, have you seen my—"

She was cut off as Ranko jumped off Kuno and they scrambled to their feet, straightening their clothes out and looking thoroughly embarrassed. Ukyo's eyes went wide and her jaw dropped.

"There's an explanation for that," Ranko said hastily. "Right, Kuno?"

"Um, of _course_," he gave a small, nervous laugh. "You see, she was...ah...choking! Yes, she stopped breathing and I had to…breathe life…back…in…her?"

Ukyo stared at the two of them for a moment longer. "Ok," she said before going back in and closing the door. A few awkward moments later, Ranko and Kuno rejoined the rest of them inside.

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An old television set sat perched on one end of the living room. It didn't work, but that didn't stop the gang from watching it. They sat crowded around it, all except Shampoo and Ukyo, who were in the kitchen. The others were not so much watching TV as watching what was in front of it; they were playing charades.

There was laughter as Hiroshi guessed something way, way off, and the laughter was soon drowned out by sounds of arguing and fighting coming from the kitchen. The others sighed.

"Why did you let them _both_ cook dinner?" Ryoga groaned.

"Yeah, really," Daisuke said. "Those two mix like oil and yogurt."

"But they're both foxy as hell," Hiroshi threw in.

"Look, I couldn't say no to one and let the other cook, right?" Ranma reasoned. "That would've hurt someone's feelings."

"Maybe _I_ should just cook dinner," Akane suggested.

"NO!" was the simultaneous reaction of everyone in the room, causing Akane to flinch.

"O_kay!_ …God!"

There was suddenly a very loud bang coming from somewhere in the room, causing them all to turn. By the fireplace, there was a cellar door built into the floor that had been covered by a large rectangular rug. Something had just slammed into the door from the other side, knocking the rug into the air and uncovering the door, rattling the chains that sat loosely atop it.

"What the hell was _that?_" Ukyo asked as she and Shampoo emerged from the kitchen, covered in baking supplies.

"Yeah, Ranma, what was that?" Ryoga asked, still looking towards the cellar.

"I don't know."

"It came from the cellar," Mousse said, stating the obvious.

"I didn't know this place even _had_ a cellar," Ranko said, surprised. "Did you, Ranma?"

Ranma shook his head. He slowly began to move towards the cellar door. Kuno stepped up next to him and they both lifted the wooden hatch, leaning it back. The inside of the cellar was pitch-black. Nothing could be seen or heard.

"Who's got a flashlight?" Ranma asked, looking towards the others.

Daisuke reached into his pack and pulled out a flashlight, which he then tossed to Ranma. Ranma turned it on and began to shine it into the darkness of the cellar.

Ranko also reached into her pack and tossed Kuno her flashlight. Ranma and Kuno descended into the basement.

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The interior of the cellar was damp. The walls were made of stone and the floor was made of dirt. Rotted wood served as support beams for the place. Several metal pipes used for plumbing were dripping water all over the place.

Ranma and Kuno shined their lights around, hoping to catch sight of whatever had caused the disturbance. Although the cellar looked small, it held three rooms. Ranma wandered towards one.

While walking, Ranma almost tripped, then looked down. There was a slight mound underneath his feet, as if something had just been recently dug and filled up in that spot. After studying the mound for a moment, he shrugged and continued on.

As he got closer to the entrance, he noticed a single glove hanging on the wall to the right. It wasn't an ordinary work glove, however…it was specially modified to hurt people, as four six-inch steel blades had been placed on each fingertip. Curious, he leaned close to it and inspected it, finding what looked like blood on the blades…but he supposed it could've been paint. _Not likely,_ Ranma thought.

While staring at the glove, he felt a strange sense of déjà vu, but he ignored it and continued on.

Walking a little further, Ranma entered the next room. The worst smell emanated from the room, a smell Ranma couldn't place. He covered his nose briefly, but soon decided to just not worry about it. The smell was becoming less and less potent with every second he was in there.

Looking around the room, Ranma's flashlight fell on something. He stared for a moment and then approached it. It was an old dirty table, and on top of it sat three objects: a tape recorder, a ceremonial dagger of some sort, and a very ugly-looking old book.

"Kuno," Ranma called. A moment later, Kuno showed up at the entrance to the room. He looked at the items illuminated by the flashlight.

"What's that?" he asked.

"I don't know. Let's bring it upstairs and see."

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Ranma emerged from the cellar holding the book. Kuno came out behind him, holding the tape recorder and the dagger. Everyone stood, anxious to see what was going on.

"What's that stuff?" Mousse asked.

"We found it in the cellar," Ranma said as he walked over and placed the book on the coffee table in the living room. Kuno followed suit, placing the tape recorder and dagger on the table.

"So someone _has_ been here," Mousse noted.

"Shampoo hope they no come back tonight," she said.

"That is a big knife," Hiroshi said, staring at it.

"We gonna listen to a tape?" Daisuke asked.

Ranko picked up the book and began to study the cover. She ran her fingers over the sickly brownish leather (or so she _thought_ it was leather) and looked at the demonic face twisted in anger that was on the front. "What _is_ this thing?"

Ukyo reached over and grabbed the dagger off the table, where she began to inspect it. The handle and blade were made of bone that narrowed down and came to a long, sharp point. At the base of the handle was a small skull, its mouth hanging open in a silent scream.

Ryoga looked from the two girls to Ranma. "Is that all you found down there?"

For a moment, Ranma had been about to mention the glove he'd seen hanging on the wall, but he decided not to. As if the things they brought up weren't freaky enough, the last thing Ranma wanted to show them was a potential or possible murder weapon. He nodded stiffly.

"What do you think these people were doing with stuff like this?" Akane asked Ranma.

Ranma shook his head, bewildered, and Kuno looked at Akane. "There may be only one way to find out."

He looked down and the others followed his gaze to the tape recorder sitting on the table. Kuno held his finger over the play button for a moment before pressing it. After a few seconds of silence and a little bit of static, a middle-aged man's voice emerged from the speaker.

"After many years of searching, I believe we have finally found what we've been looking for," the voice said. It appeared to be an audio log of some kind. The voice continued on. "My research team has uncovered the _Necronomicon ex Mortis_, or loosely translated, _The Book of the Dead_. Its pages are inked in blood and it is bound in human flesh."

Ranko immediately dropped the book to the table, a disgusted look on her face. Kuno, Ukyo, and Ryoga glanced at her briefly before returning their attention to the tape.

"As for our research, Dr. King and my wife, Linda, have been studying the dagger we found with the book. So far, they have not been able to determine anything of significance. Meanwhile, Mr. Williams and I have been deciphering the words in the text and have figured out most of them. Mr. Williams, will you please proceed?"

At that point in the tape, another man cleared his throat and began to read out loud. The words he spoke were in Latin, which Ranma, along with everyone else, did not know. As the man continued chanting, Ranma felt the hairs on the back of his neck stand up. The others had similar reactions.

"Is this a good idea?" Hiroshi asked nervously. No one answered him, as the lights in the house began to flicker on and off suddenly. Everyone looked around wildly.

"What the fuck is going on here?" Ryoga asked loudly.

As the lights flickered and the others began to panic, Ranma had the strangest feeling that something outside was rushing towards the cabin. Although it was strange, Ranma never felt so sure about anything in his life. "Something's coming."

Mousse looked from Ranma to the front door to the tape player. He moved to press the stop button but just before he pressed it, the front door flew open, surprising everyone, and a large gust of wind tore through the house. There was a horrible stench followed by a loud, deep roaring.

The wind began to blow so hard that it knocked everyone to the floor. It died down after a few moments, but not completely. They looked up as they heard a demonic, evil voice emanating from the center of the room. It sounded as if whatever was speaking had several voices behind it, at least two or three that they could all hear. Several twisted and evil-looking ghostly faces appeared in the air over the coffee table.

"YOU HAVE DISTURBED OUR SLUMBER!" the demonic voice proclaimed. "WE SHALL TEAR YOUR SOULS FROM YOUR BODY, THAT YOU MAY BECOME ONE OF US! DEAD BY DAWN! _DEAD BY DAWN!_ WE'LL SWALLOW YOUR SOULS! _NOBODY GETS OUT ALIVE!"_

The voice and the ghosts suddenly dissipated and the wind was gone as the front door slammed shut. They all stayed on the floor for a minute, wide-eyed, panting, and scared.

Ranma scrambled over to the tape recorder on the table, grabbed it, and moved back to where he was, drawing looks from the others. He held down the fast-forward button for a few seconds and then pressed the play button. What followed sounded like the start of a new log.

"…Linda and Dr. King are dead. Williams took off…I should never have told him to read the incantation…"

"Fuck," Ranma panted, stopping the tape, "_now_ he tells us."

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The ten of them stood in the living room, crowded around the coffee table. The dagger and the book sat before them on the table. Ranma still clutched the tape recorder.

"Ok," he said after a heavy sigh. "I think we need to listen to the rest of this."

"What?" Hiroshi asked loudly, looking at Ranma. "Did you happen to notice what just happened here?"

Ranma stared back. Hiroshi was losing his cool. "Yeah, I did. And if you got any better ideas, I suggest you speak up."

Hiroshi scoffed and looked unbelievingly at Ranma. "Fuck yeah, I got a better idea! Let's get the fuck _outta _here!"

Ranma didn't even have to say anything; Daisuke said it for him. "But dude, that thing is fucking out there waiting for us! It's _out_ there!"

"Don't be foolish, Hiroshi," Kuno said. "We need to formulate a plan of action."

"Sorry guys, but the only plan of action _I'm_ formulating is to leave before that thing comes back in here and mutilates us. That thing said that nobody's getting out of here. It warned us. If you guys stay here, you _deserve_ to die."

"Hiroshi…" Ukyo started, but he simply held up a hand as he walked past her.

"Dude?" Daisuke asked, but Hiroshi ignored him and went for the front door. He didn't even look back as he slammed the door shut behind him.

"He'll be back," Ryoga said, but he wasn't so sure.

Ranma watched the door for a moment longer before looking back down at the tape recorder and sighing loudly. He looked around at the others. "Let's listen to the tape some more...see if this guy left us any clues on how to stop this thing. Agreed?"

They all nodded. He set the tape recorder on the table and pressed the play button, starting from right after the incantation.

"…Linda and Dr. King are dead. Williams took off…I should never have told him to read the incantation…he's dead now though, of that I'm sure. After Williams read the incantation, we were all assaulted by some kind of demonic entity. At first, we were all fine, as the entity disappeared for quite some time. But then…_things_…began to happen. Dr. King became…possessed by the entity, turned into a grotesque demon freak, and…he attacked Linda. I tried to stop him without resorting to violence, but he was too powerful and determined. I grabbed the wood axe…and I cut his head off. That was not the end of it, though; I had to drag his body out to the shed, where I was forced to cut all his limbs off as they continued to try to attack me, even when he was decapitated."

At that point in the tape, the man sighed heavily and seemed to be having trouble dealing with what he was about to say next.

"Not too long after that, Linda…my beautiful wife…she, too, became possessed, her body host to a Kandarian demon. I had no choice…she toyed with me for a while, making me think I could save her…but in the end…I had to do what I had to do. After it was done, I wrapped what was left of Linda and Dr. King in some garbage bags and buried them in the earthen floor of the cellar."

A look of realization passed very briefly over Ranma's face. He had walked right over their corpses earlier and hadn't even realized it.

"Once I was finished burying them, I went out front. As I said before, I know that Williams is dead because he tried to escape. There is no escape…it won't let you leave. The trees…the trees got him…"

Ranma suddenly went wide-eyed, as did the others as they jumped up and raced for the front door. As Ranma pulled the door open, they all screamed as they were met by a blood-soaked Hiroshi, deep cuts and scratches lining many parts of his body, especially his face. Hiroshi fell forward, collapsing to the floor inside. Looks of horror crossed over everyone's faces. Ukyo kneeled down and turned him on his side, elevating his head. Ryoga slammed the door and leaned against it, panting.

"I'll go get some wet towels!" Ranko said, already running for them.

The others only looked down at him as he coughed up a good amount of blood before speaking. "Trees…the trees…they killed me, Ranma!"

"You're not dead, man, it's ok," Ranma said reassuringly, but he knew better. Hiroshi was seconds from death.

As Hiroshi tried to look up at them, they gasped as they saw that his left eye had been torn open by a long, gaping slash wound to his face. "Watch out for the trees…you can get out…"

And then Hiroshi went limp as he exhaled one final, shaky breath. Ranko returned with the damp towels, only to find the others silently mourning the death of Hiroshi. Ukyo gently laid his head down on the floor and stood up. Her shirt was stained with Hiroshi's blood. She was very pale and looked as though she were about to be sick.

Daisuke turned and walked over to the fireplace. He grabbed the rug that sat in front of it and returned to the front door, where Hiroshi's corpse lay. The others stepped out of the way as he placed the rug over his dead friend. He did not say anything, only stared harshly down at the rug.

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They left Hiroshi's body at the front entrance for the time being. Again, they were clustered in the living room, paging through the book. Daisuke sat on the couch, contemplating things and how to deal with them. Ranma stood hunched over the open book, Ryoga and Shampoo looking over his shoulder and trying to be of some assistance.

"No, no," Ryoga said. "Go back a few pages."

Ranma flipped back a couple of pages and Shampoo put her finger down on the page before he could go any further. "Here it is," she said.

They looked over the page. There were sketches of twisted and evil demons, and between the sketches was writing the likes of which Ranma had never seen.

"Yeah, but I can't understand any of this shit, it's some foreign language."

"Yeah, but which one?" Mousse said from across the room.

Akane walked over and peered over Ranma's shoulder. "Jeez, it looks like Latin or something."

Daisuke looked up, suddenly alert. "What? It's Latin?"

They all turned to look at him.

"I think so," Akane said.

He pushed himself up off the couch and moved over to where Ranma and everyone stood. "Let me see that."

Ranma moved over so Daisuke could look at the text. He studied it for a moment, running his finger over the foreign language in the text. He scoffed slightly and grinned a little.

"It _is_ Latin."

Ranma looked at him questioningly. "Does that make a difference?"

"Yeah, it might…" He looked over at Ranma. "I know how to read some of it."

"Why you no say something before?" Shampoo asked him.

"Yeah, how come you didn't speak up when that guy on the tape started chanting?" Mousse asked, slightly perturbed.

"I don't know any of the words that guy said," Daisuke said, turning to Mousse. "I don't even know half the words in here, but I'm pretty sure I can figure some of it out with a little time."

"I don't think we have a little time," Ranma said.

"Wait a second, where the hell did you learn to read _Latin_?" Ryoga asked Daisuke.

"I needed a language credit, so I took a Latin class during summer school one year…got into it, started reading it outside of school."

"Let's hope it paid off," Ukyo said.

"Alright," Ranko said, walking over to Daisuke, "tell us what it says."

He looked over the page. "Ok…from what I can read of it, it's talking about some kind of curse. I can't read the specifics, but…" He looked over at the rug that covered Hiroshi's corpse, then back to the book. "…It's obviously pretty bad. It mentions the entity we saw and refers to it as 'The Evil Force'."

"So there's nothing on that page about how to stop this…entity?" Kuno asked.

"Uh…no. But it does say something else here…"

"About what?" Ranma asked.

Daisuke had an expression of concentration as he read over the text. "Hmm…it talks about other creatures released by The Evil Force."

"You mean like the trees?" Akane asked.

"No…I can't really make out this word right here, it says 'Dead'…something."

As the others crowded next to Daisuke and leaned over the text, giving it their full attention while they tried to figure the word out, no one saw the rug that covered Hiroshi's corpse jerk upward suddenly. It fell off, exposing Hiroshi's grotesquely monstrous face. A cloudy bluish-white haze covered his entire right eye, and his left eye poured fresh blood. He slowly rotated his head three-hundred-sixty degrees, his neck cracking horribly as he did so, and he looked at the group. No one seemed to notice him or the sound.

"No, wait…ok, before that, it says that 'The Evil Force can'…something…'turning them into Deadites.' _That's_ what the word is."

"What's a 'Deadite', and turning _what_ into it?" Mousse questioned.

Daisuke focused on the words he could not remember.

Hiroshi stood. Without moving his head, he turned his body around to face the same direction his head was facing. That cracking sound came again, and this time Ranma, his back to Hiroshi, looked up briefly before looking back down at the book. Hiroshi slowly began to walk towards them, his footsteps silent.

"Let's see…" Daisuke went on. "I think I got it…'The Evil Force can…possess humans and…corpses'…"

They all looked up slowly, realization dawning on all their faces. They simultaneously turned their heads to see Hiroshi's demon-possessed corpse standing before them. As they all screamed, the Hiroshi-Deadite opened its mouth and screamed back, a loud, deep roar of something inhuman.

With amazing speed, the Hiroshi-Deadite struck out at them with his arm, sending Ranma, Daisuke, Kuno, and Ranko flying backwards over the coffee table. Ryoga moved forward and threw a massive punch at the creature, connecting with its chest and pushing it back across the room. The Hiroshi-Deadite looked at Ryoga and giggled suddenly, a high-pitched squeal that made Ryoga's skin crawl. Amazingly, the Hiroshi-Deadite levitated in the air and glided towards Ryoga, arms outstretched, fingernails elongated in deadly claws. As Ryoga stood paralyzed awaiting his fate, Ukyo suddenly shoved him out of the way.

Ranma and the others were getting back to their feet as the Hiroshi-Deadite grabbed a hold of Ukyo, catching her with both hands on either shoulder. Ukyo had a look of surprise and fear on her face as the Hiroshi-Deadite lifted her up off her feet, roaring in her face. Its lower jaw began to distend and grow with incredible cracking sounds. Razor sharp teeth began to poke out from its black gums.

Finally regaining some composure, Ranma's hand went to his head and he felt blood. He looked at the Hiroshi-Deadite and saw what was happening. "Ukyo!" he cried as he ran to aid her, followed by Shampoo. They both tugged on the Hiroshi-Deadite's arms, but with a simple violent shrug, it was able to send Ranma into the wall behind him. With its other arm, it released Ukyo and lashed out at Shampoo, its claws scratching her face slightly, drawing three thin lines of blood. She fell back, stunned.

Ukyo finally found her voice and she began to scream as she looked into the abyss of the Hiroshi-Deadite's gullet. The only thing she could see was rows of razor-sharp teeth. The Hiroshi-Deadite quickly lowered Ukyo into its mouth headfirst, until she was engulfed to her waist. Her legs kicked wildly, and her muffled screams could be heard. With a loud, think crunching sound, the Hiroshi-Deadite bit down hard and severed Ukyo's torso from her lower half. Her legs dropped to the floor, still twitching slightly.

Akane reached onto the coffee table and grabbed the dagger. With a cry, she ran over to the Hiroshi-Deadite and plunged the blade into the back of its skull. The Hiroshi-Deadite let out a scream of pain as it puked up the rest of Ukyo's remains on the floor; a badly shredded and bloodied torso. The Hiroshi-Deadite began to puke up gallons of blood, and the others drew away from the mess, horrified, but transfixed on the sight before them. Its death screams went on and on as it began to puke up white fluid along with the blood. After what seemed like hours (but was actually about a minute), the creature finally dropped to the floor in a massive puddle of its own fluids.

After a few moments of shocked silence in which they all stared at the dead bodies of the Hiroshi-Deadite and Ukyo, Ranma stood up. His eyes were wide and he was still staring at Ukyo's torso. In a shaky voice, he said: "We gotta clean this up."

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Kuno and Ryoga had just finished dragging the corpses to the cellar. They had been quick about it, not wanting to see what other surprises this place had in store for them. After dropping Ukyo's torso into the cellar, they closed the door and pulled the chain through the small metal donuts bolted into the floor around it, locking it tightly.

"Finished," Ryoga said.

Ranko, meanwhile, was dabbing a wet towel over the cuts on Shampoo's face. They had been thin cuts, but they had bled quite a bit. "That looks painful. You ok?"

"Shampoo ok," she said, allowing Ranko to dab away. "Is just a scratch."

Meanwhile, Mousse and Ranma were in the entrance to the kitchen, arguing quietly.

"You _saw_ what just happened back there, Ranma," Mousse whispered, looking from Ranma to the others and back to Ranma. "Hiroshi was right; we're not safe if we stay here."

"Yeah, but look what happened to _him_," Ranma countered. "It's looking like we're not going to be safe anywhere around here."

Mousse sighed heavily, realizing that Ranma was right. "Well, we can't just sit here and wait for it to come back. We need help."

"What about that car out there? The keys are still in the ignition."

"We won't all fit in there."

"Yeah, but someone can ride out to the nearest town and bring back some help. The police or something."

"But who?"

"I will," a voice said suddenly from next to them, causing them to turn. It was Akane. She had been standing there listening to them.

"What?" Ranma asked her. "No, no _way!_ You're not going out there!"

"I can _do_ it, Ranma!" she yelled back. "Please…someone has to get help, right?"

Ranma was walking back and forth, shaking his head as if he could not believe she would even suggest the possibility. The argument was now drawing the attention of the others.

Akane placed her hand gently on his forearm and he stopped, looking at her. He knew he would not be able to stop her.

"Alright, but…" he began, swallowing hard. "…one of us goes with you."

After a few moments of silent hesitation from the others, Mousse stepped forward. "I'll do it."

Ranma looked at him. "Are you sure?"

"Yeah," he said, releasing a shaky breath. "I mean…you guys hold down the fort and…we'll bring back some help. Simple enough."

Ranma nodded, wondering to himself if that would be the case.

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Akane and Mousse were standing by the door, ready to go. Ranma was going over it with them one last time.

"Ok," he said, holding the doorknob, "I open the door, you two run like hell for the car, and haul ass until you find a town or a cop. Don't stop for anyone or anything else, ok?"

They both nodded, and Ranma pulled Akane to him in a hug. Mousse looked away, slightly uncomfortable.

"Mousse," Shampoo said from her place on the couch, and he looked over at her. "You be careful for Shampoo. Try not to die until you come back."

Mousse grinned and nodded. His face returned to serious mode, and Ranma released Akane, positioning himself in front of the door. "You ready?"

Both Akane and Mousse nodded to him, and Ranma pulled the door open. The two of them took a deep breath and ran out into the night air.

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As Akane raced for the car, she looked over and saw the same look of fear on Mousse's face that she imagined was on her own. The one thing she really hoped would not happen is that she would trip over a rock or her own feet, causing her to sprawl out on the ground and thus, become easy prey for whatever was lurking out in the woods.

Mousse opened the driver's side door and jumped into the seat behind the wheel. As Akane reached the passenger's side door, she had the strangest feeling of something large rushing at her from behind. The feeling overwhelmed her, and she yanked the door open and jumped in as fast as she could.

Once they were both safely inside, they let out a little laugh, smiling at each other. Mousse turned the key in the ignition and the engine started up.

"Ok, um…" Mousse said, looking at the dashboard.

"Turn on the headlights," Akane instructed.

Mousse reached over and switched on the headlights, illuminating the woods before them. As they looked ahead at what the light uncovered, they both gasped and cringed back in their seats. A giant pair of blood-red eyes hovered in the air in front of the car, a demonic presence glaring down at them.

"JOIN US!" the evil voice spoke.

"_Get us out of here!"_ Akane screamed.

Mousse threw the car into reverse, backed away, and the tires squealed as the car peeled out of the dirt driveway.

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"They made it," Ranma said, holding one of the curtains aside as he, Ranko, Kuno, and Ryoga watched out the window. He turned his attention back to the others, walking over to the coffee table. Shampoo and Daisuke were posted on the couch in front of it, and the Necronomicon, the dagger, and the tape recorder all rested on the table.

"So what do we do until they get back?" Ryoga asked.

"First, I say we listen to the rest of the tape."

They sat down as Ranma rewound the tape slightly and then pressed the play button.

"--is no escape…it won't let you leave. The trees…the trees got him…but not me. I went to the car, I was going to drive away from all this madness. I even got as far as putting the keys in the ignition, but that's when I heard it. Linda's voice, calling me back into the cabin, into the cellar. I have just re-entered the cabin and am preparing to go down there. To whoever finds and listens to this tape, you will probably have listened to the incantation and awoken the evil dead. For this, I am truly sorry, but I could not bring myself to erase the work which I have spent my life searching for. If you can hold out until dawn, you can make it. There is another way, though…the book speaks of a way to destroy the evil, but it involves at least two people: one to read the spell, and one to destroy the evil with the dagger when it appears in the flesh. Since this opportunity does not apply to me, I will be heading down into the cellar now. I only hope that whatever comes next is quick."

After a brief moment of static, the sound of a button being pressed came through the speaker, followed by silence. The man had turned the recorder off, presumably to go do what he said he was going to do. They all looked at each other.

"He said there's a way to kill it," Kuno said to Daisuke. "All you have to do is say the words while we kill it."

"Yeah, but I'm going to have to figure out which passage on what page," Daisuke said, sitting forward and looking through the book.

"And we need some weapons, something we can defend ourselves with," Ranma said, eyeing Ryoga. "You and me are going out back."

"What?" Ryoga asked. "Why, what's out back?"

"There's a tool shed," Ranko said, remembering.

Ranma looked at Kuno. "You and Ranko and Shampoo stay here and make sure nothing happens to Daisuke. We need him to translate those passages."

Kuno nodded. "I should've brought my bokken…"

"Don't worry, I'll bring you back something good," Ranma said as he patted Kuno on the shoulder. He and Ryoga walked to the front door and stepped out.

As soon as the door closed behind them, things began to happen inside the cabin. A large grandfather clock that sat in one corner of the room suddenly began to ring loudly, proclaiming that it was midnight. The lights began to flicker on and off, giving it a strobe-like quality. The furniture began to rattle and shake. Somewhere in one of the bedrooms, an old record player started up and blared music. After a few moments of this, the lights came back on, the grandfather clock shut up, and the record player died down.

"Man, I hope they get back soon," Ranko said, her voice shaky.

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Mousse kept his foot on the gas. It had been a little hard to see where they were going, but once he saw the dirt trail they had followed on the way up to the cabin, he knew where he was. They would simply follow it all the way back across the bridge, through the woods, and onto the nearest highway, where they would find a cop and tell him there was a murder.

As he was thinking these thoughts, Mousse was not really paying attention to the path ahead of him. He was startled when Akane gasped and screamed suddenly.

"Mousse, _watch out!_"

Looking ahead, Mousse slammed on the brakes with both feet, drawing the car to a stop and causing him and Akane to jerk forward. His mouth hung agape as he first simply stared out the windshield, then unbuckled his seatbelt, opened the door, and stepped out. Akane followed suit.

Mousse walked up to the wreckage of the bridge. The wood that was left had been twisted back in his direction, splintered and resembling a giant, skeletal hand. It completely blocked any path through. Upon closer inspection, Mousse realized there _was_ no path through; as he looked past the twisted wood, he saw that the bridge no longer remained. The only way to go was straight down into a very large gorge…or back the way they came.

"It won't let us leave," Akane said, the horror showing on her face.

A deep growl came from the gorge in front of them, the sound of something inhuman, and Mousse slowly began to step backwards. "Akane…get back in the car."

With a look of realization, Akane scrambled back to the car and hopped into the passenger's seat. Mousse finally turned and ran back to the car. Every few seconds, he looked over his shoulder, and the look of terror on his face intensified. He jumped in the car, threw it in reverse, and backed away quickly. In the glare of the headlights, Akane could only make out the shape of a large, black form, its eyes glowing red in the darkness. Mousse turned the wheel and hit the brake, spinning the car around, and he threw it into drive. In the rearview mirror, he could still see the thing chasing them at a good speed. He pressed the gas pedal to the floor.

"My God, what _was_ that thing?" Akane practically screamed. Mousse could not answer; he only concentrated on the path before them.

"We have to get back to the others," he said. It was the only thing he could think of.

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As they walked around the side of the cabin, Ryoga stopped suddenly, causing Ranma to stop and turn to him questioningly. "What?"

"Shh," Ryoga said, holding a finger up. A hooting sound came from the woods suddenly. "You hear that?"

"It's just an owl, Ryoga."

"Right…sorry."

They continued on towards the back of the house, where a small woodshed sat. The door was barred by a block of wood which Ranma lifted and tossed aside. He pulled the door open and stepped inside, pulling the light cord that hung down in front of his face. He looked back once to make sure Ryoga was still there. He was, and he was looking around at the various tools/weaponry the small shed had to offer.

"Look there," Ranma said, pointing. Ryoga looked and saw a wood axe, a hatchet, and a machete. The blades were embedded in a wooden table, and the axe blade was covered in blood. "That must be the axe the guy on the tape used."

Ryoga pulled up on the axe's handle and jiggled it slightly, loosening it. He held it up and looked at it. "This is good." Ranma nodded and turned away.

Ryoga heard a snapping sound outside the door suddenly and his head jerked in that direction. He squinted, almost sure he saw something moving, and he slowly made his way to the door, weapon raised.

Meanwhile, Ranma looked on another table nearby and spotted a twenty-pound sledgehammer. He grabbed it, holding it in both hands. "This is good too, but…"

Looking over towards the far wall, Ranma saw something hanging on it covered by a dirty white sheet. He walked over and pulled the sheet off, and he grinned widely. "_This_ is more like it!"

Under the sheet was a mid-sized chainsaw. It was in good condition, and it didn't appear to have been used much. He reached up and pulled it off the wall, holding it and trying to get a feel for it.

"What do you think, Ryoga?" he said, turning around. The grin disappeared from his face as he saw that Ryoga was no longer in the shed with him. "Ryoga?"

Ranma went to the door and stepped out. He looked around in all directions, whispering loudly. "Ryoga!"

The only things Ranma could see were ominous-looking tree limbs swaying back and forth in the dark. He cursed and ran back into the shed, grabbing the chainsaw, the sledgehammer, the hatchet, and the machete. Once he had all the weapons, he ran back towards the front of the house.

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Daisuke was now pacing behind the couch in the living room, concentrating on the words in the book. Every now and then, he would go to the kitchen table, write a translation down on a notepad he had brought with him, and then began pacing again. Kuno stood nearby, watching him. Ranko was at the fireplace, working the wood around with the poker. Shampoo sat on the couch, entranced by the blazing flames.

"_Shit!_" Daisuke yelled, frustrated. "I'm never going to figure this fucking thing out."

"Do not worry, Daisuke," Kuno said. "Take your time."

"Ranma'll be back any second now with those weapons, and we'll be able to defend ourselves," Ranko said, turning to look at the others. "Right, Sham—"

Ranko stopped mid-sentence, her face going pale and her eyes going wide as she slowly stood. Kuno noticed and Daisuke took his attention away from the book.

"Ranko?" Kuno asked, stepping forward. "What's wrong?"

She was staring at Shampoo, whose back was to the men. Shampoo stood up suddenly and turned to look at Kuno and Daisuke, and they gasped. Her face was a twisted mask of hideousness, and her eyes were glazed white. Her mouth hung open, filled with razor-teeth.

Daisuke let the book drop out of his hands to the floor as he stood paralyzed, staring at the Shampoo-Deadite. "Holy fuck—"

The Shampoo-Deadite roared and ran towards Daisuke, arms outstretched in an effort to grab him. Just before she was in reaching distance, Kuno stepped between them and kicked the Shampoo-Deadite in the stomach, sending her backwards, doubled over.

"_Don't let her get Daisuke!"_ Kuno yelled.

As the Shampoo-Deadite regained its composure, Ranko moved forward and struck it in the back of the head with the fire poker. The Shampoo-Deadite grunted and whirled on Ranko. It grabbed her by the neck and lifted her in the air, then tossed her into the wall over the fireplace, which she bounced off of. The Shampoo-Deadite turned back to Kuno, who was charging up to strike it, and it moved out of the way, tossing Kuno into the kitchen, sending him through the table.

Ranko shook her head, trying to clear her vision, she stood and began to walk back towards the Shampoo-Deadite, but her ankle was suddenly grabbed and she fell to the floor, surprised. Looking back in terror, she saw that Ukyo, too, had become a Deadite, and her torso had pulled itself to the top of the cellar steps, where it currently was positioned. The Ukyo-Deadite's face and arms were visible in the darkness of the cellar as it tried to pull Ranko in.

"Come with us, Ranko…" the Deadite taunted as it pulled her closer.

With a cry, Ranko kicked the Ukyo-Deadite square in the face twice, causing it to release her. She stood up and backed away as it still reached for her.

Meanwhile, the Shampoo-Deadite continued towards Daisuke and grabbed him by the neck. It pushed him into the wall behind him and lifted him off his feet. Daisuke could only look back at her ugly, monstrous features as she was about to kill him.

The Shampoo-Deadite hissed at him. "I'll swallow your _soul!_" it screamed in a deep, evil voice.

"Swallow this, you fucking _bitch!_" Ranko screamed.

The Shampoo-Deadite spun around and released Daisuke as Ranko shoved the fire poker into its mouth, skewering its head and pinning it to the wall. The Shampoo-Deadite gagged, trying to remove the poker, but it was lodged in there good. Instead, the creature wailed and its limbs thrashed wildly as blood poured from its mouth. Ranko helped Daisuke up, who quickly scrambled away from the Shampoo-Deadite. She then went over and helped a bruised Kuno to his feet, brushing him off.

"Thank you," he said, rubbing the back of his head. He looked over at the Shampoo-Deadite. "What do we do with her?"

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Ranma let the weapons rest against the cabin as he opened the front door, stepping inside and dragging the weapons with him. When he turned around, he was shocked to see the Shampoo-Deadite pinned to the wall, limbs flailing. He saw Ranko and Kuno standing near the kitchen entrance, Kuno rubbing the back of his head. Daisuke was backed up as far as he could be against a wall far away from the Deadite. Another look around and Ranma saw the Ukyo-Deadite's arms writhing around from under the cellar door.

"What the _fuck_ happened here?" Ranma asked, a look of pure surprise on his face.

Ranko walked up to him. "Thank God you found weapons."

"I was gone for, like, five minutes!"

"Yeah, and…" she turned, motioning towards the Deadites with her hand. She turned back to him, grabbing for the hatchet.

He handed it to her. "Did Ryoga happen to come back in here?"

Her eyes went wide. "No…you mean he's still out there?"

"Man, he wandered off somewhere again. I just hope he's smart enough to stay hidden." He held up the sledgehammer, looking past his sister to Kuno. "Told you I'd hook you up."

Kuno approached him, taking the sledgehammer from him, wielding it with both hands. "Very nice," he remarked as he walked over next to the Shampoo-Deadite, holding the sledgehammer at his side, and looked back at Ranma. "Now, what should we do with her?"

Ranma, leaving his chainsaw by the front entrance, walked over and handed Daisuke the machete. Daisuke looked at it for a moment, then slowly reached for it, grabbed it, and studied the blade. Ranma turned back to Kuno and walked over near him.

"We should put her in the cellar. But first…"

"I know," Kuno said, raising the sledgehammer. "Ranko, my lady, please…turn away."

She nodded and looked away. Ranma gave her a strange look, but she could not see it.

Kuno turned to face the Shampoo-Deadite. With a loud grunt, he swung the sledgehammer with all his might at the Shampoo-Deadite's face above the poker.

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Mousse stopped the car as they came to the front of the cabin. Without even turning the engine off, he and Akane jumped out and ran towards the entrance. As Akane reached the door, she was reaching for the knob when Mousse cried out suddenly. She spun around to see that one of the many tree branches from the ominous trees had wrapped around one of his arms, yanking him backwards violently.

"_Mousse!"_ Akane screamed.

"Just get inside!" he shouted.

Another branch shot out of the darkness and wrapped around Mousse's other arm, and they lifted him to his feet. The stretched his arms, pulling in both directions, and Mousse screamed in pain. The front door opened behind Akane and Ranma stepped out behind her, followed by Ranko, Kuno, and Daisuke. Two more branches came out of the dark and wrapped around both his legs, and a final branch wrapped around his neck.

"Oh my God," Kuno said.

"Mousse!" Ranma yelled.

Behind Mousse's struggling form, that rumbling, inhuman growl came again and two large red eyes came into view in the darkness. The others looked on in horror as all the branches began to twist and pull. Mousse screamed in pain as his limbs began to tear off his body. His scream was cut short as his head was removed, along with his entire spinal cord, and the branches tossed his body parts deep into the woods towards the glowing red eyes.

Akane leaned over the side of the porch and began to puke. The red eyes in the woods began to draw much closer, and after a moment, Ranma grabbed Akane and yanked her inside, slamming the door shut as hard as he could.

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After they'd had a chance to recover for a few minutes from what they'd witnessed, they started asking questions.

"What happened?" Ranko asked Akane. "You were supposed to go get help."

"The bridge," Akane said softly. "Something destroyed the bridge. There's no way back the way we came." She looked around. "What happened to Shampoo and Ryoga?"

"Ryoga wandered off while we were outside," Ranma explained sadly, implying that he thought Ryoga might be dead. "And Shampoo…well, I guess those scratches on her face infected her with whatever _they've_ got." He pointed his thumb towards Ukyo, who was sitting quietly with the door rested against the top of her head, her eyes the only thing visible in the small slit showing into the cellar.

Akane lowered her head. She had not been prepared for any of this, and it was becoming too much for her. She wondered how Ranma was keeping his head in all of this.

"There might be some good news, though."

She looked back at him.

"After you and Mousse went to get help, we listened to the rest of the tape. The guy said that there's a way to beat The Evil Force, a spell in the Necronomicon we can use to turn it into a living thing and kill it. Daisuke's almost finished translating the passages."

Akane nodded, and Ranma held her then. She clung to him, and he was hoping that she would be able to handle herself after a while. Unfortunately, they didn't have a while. After a few minutes of this, while Ranko and Kuno stood alert, waiting for anything, Daisuke stood up from the coffee table, closing the Necronomicon.

"I've got it," he said.

Ranma looked up in surprise. "You got it? The whole thing?"

"Hell yeah! I told you, all I needed was a little time—"

As he took a step forward, Ukyo's arms shot out from the darkness of the cellar and wrapped around both of Daisuke's ankles. Before anyone could react, she yanked him off his feet, sending him face-first to the floor. Ranma, Akane, Kuno, and Ranko jumped up simultaneously. Daisuke screamed as he was dragged halfway into the cellar, the fingernails of his right hand digging into the wood floor as his left hand still clutched his notes.

They all reached him and Ranma gripped his hand. The others wrapped their hands around Ranma's, trying to help him pull.

"_Ahh, don't let go!" _Daisuke screamed in pain.

Blood suddenly began to flood up from the cellar, not just spraying the others, but literally _soaking_ them with it, drenching their clothing. They fell back and Daisuke was dragged screaming into the darkness. Even after the cellar door slammed shut, they could hear his screams fading as he was dragged deeper into the black.

Panting, the others moved backwards until they were out of harm's way. Ranma looked down at his hand, where he had a scrap of bloody paper that had been torn from Daisuke's hand. "He's got the passage."

Ranma stood, grabbing a nearby towel from one of their camping packs and wiping the blood off his face. He walked over to the chainsaw that sat on the floor near the cabin's entrance and he turned to the others.

"I'm going down there."

They stared back at him, unbelieving. He only stared back at them, his face determined.

"It's the only way. We can't hold out until dawn; we'll all be dead by then. Our only option is to go down there and get those pages."

Kuno stood up, holding up the sledgehammer in both hands. "Alright," he said. "Let's do this."

Akane looked around briefly and grabbed the machete that had been set aside previously by Daisuke. Ranko grabbed the hatchet and they both stood up.

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Instead of undoing the chains, Ranma used the chainsaw to slice the door in half, splitting it down the middle. Once finished, he slammed his foot down on the door, sending the two halves swinging downward.

Ranma looked back at Ranko and Akane. "You two wait up here, ok?"

The girls nodded.

He looked at Kuno. "You ready?"

Kuno nodded, and Ranma moved forward, taking the lead. They moved slowly, trying to look everywhere at once. The cellar seemed to be a lot bigger than before, and glancing over to the far door connecting to the room where he found the book, dagger, and tape recorder, he felt mildly troubled as he realized that the custom work glove that had been hanging there earlier was now gone. He looked to the right, Kuno following close behind him. There was a trail of blood leading into a room in that direction.

"Wait here," Ranma whispered to Kuno, his chainsaw putting quietly.

Ranma moved towards the room where he suspected Daisuke's corpse was, and upon entering, he saw shredded bits of flesh and clothing covering the floor, blood smeared all over. In a severed hand nearby that Ranma knew to be Daisuke's, the pages of the spell were held tightly. Ranma picked the hand up, pried the fingers off, and collected the notes, folding them up and placing them in his front pocket. He turned back to the doorway and looked at Kuno.

"Hey, I got 'em," he said, holding up the pages. Kuno nodded and Ranma's eyes went wide suddenly. "Kuno!"

Kuno spun around in time to see the Ukyo-Deadite crawling towards him at an amazing rate of speed for a torso. It was on him in seconds, knocking him to the floor. As Ranma was making his way over there with the chainsaw, a hand fell on his shoulder suddenly and spun him around. It was the Daisuke-Deadite, and from what Ranma could tell, the Ukyo-Deadite had fucked him up very, very badly before he had become one of the evil dead. The Daisuke-Deadite's hands went for Ranma's neck and Ranma fell backwards.

As Kuno wrestled with the Ukyo-Deadite, it seemed it was overpowering him. Just as it was about to bite into his jugular, Ryoga appeared from one of the cellar's many rooms, brandishing an axe.

"Kuno!" Ryoga called.

Kuno looked over and saw Ryoga. He nodded, grabbed the Ukyo-Deadite under the chin with one hand, and raised its head up, then quickly removed his hand. With a quick swipe, Ryoga beheaded it and Kuno pushed its blood-spurting corpse off of him, getting up. They looked over at Ranma, who was struggling with the Daisuke-Deadite. Before they could go help him, they heard the sound of the chainsaw roaring into action, and they saw the blade appear as it ripped through the Daisuke-Deadite's midsection and exited out his back. It screamed inhumanly, but Ranma did not stop until the Deadite was completely dead. After a moment, the chainsaw motor made a loud popping sound and shut down.

After the Deadite lay still, Ranma pushed the mutilated corpse off of himself and Ryoga and Kuno grabbed each of his arms and helped him to his feet. He was covered from head to toe in blood. Some still dripped from the chainsaw blade.

Panting, Ranma looked at them and nodded. "Thanks."

Kuno looked at Ryoga, noticed that he also was covered in a fair amount of blood and green stuff. "How did you get in here?"

"Well, when me and Ranma were in the shed, I saw something moving around outside. I went to follow it, but whatever it was led me around to the other side of the cabin, to the outside cellar doors." He held up his axe and looked at it, then back at Kuno. "I'm really glad I had this, too, because something came out of the woods at me."

"What was it?" Ranma asked, having caught his breath.

"I don't really know what it was, but it looked almost human in some ways…except in the face, it was like those other things, the Deadites. It had a really long neck, too, and it snapped at me a couple of times before I chopped its head off. Anyway, I happened to look down at its clothes and I found a nametag on it: Dr. Williams."

They let this sink in for a moment before Ranma spoke. "If he became one of those things, that means the guy on the tape recorder did, too."

The three of them began to race back towards the cellar stairs. Just before they got there, the wooden stairs exploded upwards in a shower of splinters that sprayed everywhere. Ranma, Kuno, and Ryoga were thrown back by the force of the blast, sending them sprawled across the cellar floor.

As bits of wood rained down on them, they coughed, and Ranma was able to see the form of something rather hideous just before it shot up through the cellar opening, into the cabin's living room. He heard Akane scream.

"Akane!" he screamed back, trying to sit up. Before any of them could sit up, bloated and decayed hands burst through the dirt beneath them and held them down. One hand wrapped around Ranma's neck, two wrapped around Ryoga's torso, and one held down Kuno's left arm.

Ranma realized these were the two people the guy on the tape had chopped up and buried in there. Though they were completely removed of all their limbs, they were still "living".

Thinking quick, Kuno looked over and saw a table with a hammer, its handle laid over the edge of it. It was out of reach of his hands, but he was able to position himself in such a way that he was able to kick out the front legs, causing the hammer the fall to the floor. With his foot, Kuno pulled the hammer within reach of his hand and grabbed it. He immediately began pounding on the decayed hand with it until it released him. Once he was free, Kuno moved over Ranma and used the claw end of the hammer to snap off the hand that was restraining him. When Ranma was taken care of, Kuno and Ranma each grabbed one of the arms that held Ryoga and pried them back, allowing Ryoga to escape.

Ranma immediately ran to the stairs and saw that there was no way he would be able to make his way up them; the steps had been completely obliterated. He turned around as the others approached.

"Come on, we have to go outside and around to the front!"

He raced past them, and Kuno and Ryoga followed behind shortly.

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There was little time to think. Ranko and Akane had heard what was going on down in the cellar. They knew Ranma and Kuno were being attacked, knew that they had also just found Ryoga. However, they did _not_ expect another Deadite to burst forth from under the cellar stairs and into the living room. Not just any Deadite, but a rather horrifying one. Not that they weren't all horrifying, but something about this one made it even more so. Unlike the other Deadites, this one had something of an evil grin stretched across its face, and its neck stretched out considerably as it tried to snap at the girls. The Deadite's fingers had been eaten away to reveal the bone beneath, which had been sharpened and somehow elongated. This was the Deadite that stood before them now.

Immediately after the Deadite burst forth from the cellar, Akane and Ranko had backed away, and Akane let out a startled scream. The Deadite took notice of them right away and stalked towards them, making threats of digesting their souls. Its neck stretched out as the head tried to bite at Ranko, who flinched back. As it headed towards them, the Deadite pounded the coffee table in half in one quick blow, sending the book, the tape recorder, and the dagger in all different directions.

"_Stay back!"_ Ranko screamed at the thing.

The Deadite moved forward. Ranko looked off to one side and noticed the ceremonial dagger sitting on the floor nearby, having slid there after the creature destroyed the table. Quickly, she grabbed it and threw it at the Deadite with all her strength. The blade struck it in the chest, stopping the Deadite in its tracks. As soon as Ranko saw that this had an effect on the creature, she ran up to it and, with a scream of rage, she yanked out the dagger and plunged it back in several times, drawing blood and green stuff from the Deadite's screaming corpse.

Ranma, Ryoga, and Kuno appeared at the front entrance of the cabin. Though the Deadite was now completely dead, Ranko continued to stab away at it. Kuno ran up and pulled her away from it, trying to get her to calm down. After a moment, Ranko calmed. Ranma, meanwhile, had gone to Akane and held her to calm her down. It did not take much.

"You got the pages, Ranma?" Ryoga asked.

Releasing Akane, Ranma reached into his front pocket and pulled out several folded up pieces of paper that were spattered with blood. "Ok, here's the deal: someone needs to read these passages to make the Evil Force appear in the flesh. Then, I take this dagger and shove it down its fucking throat. Once it's dead, we pile into the car and look for a way back to the nearest town, ok?"

The other four nodded.

"Ok…who wants to read the passages?"

"I got it," Ryoga said. Ranma handed him the pages.

"Everyone else, hide somewhere where you think you'll be safe until it's over."

With that, Ranko, Kuno, and Akane left the room, presumably to go hide in one of the bedrooms or the bathroom. Ranma looked over at Ryoga.

"Are you ready?"

"Ready when you are," Ryoga said.

"Start reading."

Ryoga began to read the passages aloud. Ranma listened, waiting to see if he could hear anything, but so far there was nothing. When Ryoga got about halfway through the first page, there was a rumbling suddenly. The cabin began to shake and furniture and decorations began to rattle. Ranma gripped the dagger in one hand, waiting.

As Ryoga continued to read, the two windows on either side of the cabin's entrance exploded, spraying shards of glass all over. Two enormous tree branches, resembling giant claws, burst through and began to reach for Ryoga and Ranma. Quickly the claws wrapped around them and it slowly began to pull them towards the smashed windows. At the same time, the front door exploded in a spray of splinters, and the form of a giant, bestial head poked through.

"_Don't stop reading, Ryoga!"_ Ranma screamed as they were dragged towards closer to the creature's mouth.

On the side of the beast's head, around the neck area, the tortured faces of Shampoo, Mousse, Ukyo, Hiroshi, and Daisuke were protruding from it. They lunged outwards, their necks stretching obscenely. _"It's over! We've won! Victory is OURS!"_

As Ranma was pulled closer to the creature's gullet, he could wait no longer as he plunged the dagger into the creature's right eye. A dark, thick blue liquid poured out over Ranma's hand and the creature roared, dropping both him and Ryoga to the floor. The faces of Shampoo, Mousse, Ukyo, Hiroshi, and Daisuke also screamed in pain and anguish.

The tree-claws retracted themselves from the cabin and Ranma was able to see outside. A spinning blue vortex appeared in midair a good distance behind the creature. Wind began to rush from behind Ranma, pulling everything nearby towards the vortex.

All the windows in the house shattered as an enormous wind tore through the house, knocking things over. The floor began to crack and splinter upwards as the gale force became too much for the foundation.

The beast began to shriek and its massive head rocked back and forth. Then, it was suddenly pulled out, across the lawn and into the blue vortex that had become larger with every passing moment. Kuno, Ranko, and Akane appeared behind Ranma, clutching the doorway to one of the bedrooms to keep from being pulled out the window or open door.

"_Ranma!"_ Akane called, and he turned to her.

He tried to walk towards her, but the wind suddenly pushed him backwards forcefully, knocking him towards the window. He flipped over backwards and clutched the window sill to keep from being sucked into the vortex.

Ryoga was ducked behind the other window sill, still reading the last of the incantation.

Ranma's grip weakened as the Necronomicon hit his fingers, and he released the sill, much to the horror of his girlfriend, his sister, his sister's boyfriend. With a cry, Ranma flew helplessly towards the vortex, noting that the book had just been absorbed by it.

Finally, the last word of the incantation was spoken by Ryoga. All at once, the wind seemed to stop. Ranko looked out the window and saw Ranma drop to the ground only moments before he was pulled into the vortex.

Akane and Ranko ran out the front door to help Ranma while Kuno helped Ryoga to his feet. They both exited the cabin and stood nearby as Akane and Ranko both lifted Ranma up, then let him stand on his own. He panted loudly.

"Thanks…that was…close."

"Let's get out of here," Ryoga said, drawing nods of agreement from the others. They looked around briefly and then Ryoga noticed Ranma shaking his head.

"Nah," he said, "the car got sucked into the vortex. We gotta walk from here."

"Great," Kuno said, irritated. He looked up suddenly. "It's dawn, by the way."

The others looked up as well and noticed that the sky was indeed getting brighter.

"Well, let's get going," Akane sighed.

"You think anyone's going to believe this?" Ranko asked.

They all pondered this as they began to walk, not sure exactly where they were going. Ranma scratched absently at a wound left behind by The Evil Force's tree-claw, and the itch began to spread…

THE END…?

* * *

Author's Notes: When I first wrote this story, I had intended for it to be a two-parter, but there was just nothing inspiring about trying to write an _Army of Darkness-Ranma ½ _crossover. Sorry if I disappointed the fans (which I probably didn't) by not doing a sequel, but at least this remake was better than the original. Much longer, too. 


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